Out of the mouths of librarians

Staff meeting: While waiting for the meeting to begin, somehow the conversation turned to how
expensive hair cuts are.

Pt. Librarian, "Well, I cut my own hair and I guess that I've saved hundreds of
dollars over time." [we now know why she rocks a bad high top
fade with a duck tail]

Monthly services meeting: I was showing a fellow librarian a delightful find, Band Aid's Blister
Block. She commented that she has a hard time finding wide shoes.

Another librarian blurted, "That's why I shop at Pay*ess, they have
wide shoes in all kinds of styles."

The conversation paused......then we changed the subject.

This morning, my first hour on the reference desk. My co-worker annouces as she approached the desk, "I'm still HIGH from yesterday!" [She called in sick yesterday, saying that she was going to the emergency room to receive a morphine shot for her migraine.]

So this is how it ends today

It is my last hour on the reference desk and I have spent it listening to a patron read the World Atlas out loud. I have wanted to say something, but I realize that may be the only way that he is able to read.

Man..............these people

So, I am sitting at the reference desk minding my own business, reading somebody's blog.

A patron marched up to the desk, threw a book at me and said,"I HOPE THIS LIBRARY HAS A CHRISTIANS FOR DUMMIES book, or a PROTESTANT FOR DUMMIES book, because just having an ISLAM FOR DUMMIES book isn't right.

I respond,"I'm sure we do sir, would you like for me to check?"

Patron: "YEAH, YOU MAKE SURE THAT YOU CHECK THAT OUT!!!! IT WOULD NOT BE RIGHT IF THERE IS ONLY A 'ISLAM FOR DUMMIES' BOOK"

So as I began to search the online catalog, the fool stormed off.

Yesterday afternoon, this woman yelled at me because HER book wasn't on the shelf. As if I personally walked over and removed her book form the shelf, just so she wouldn't have the pleasure of walking in here and seeing her work on the shelf.

I went through the trouble of searching high and low for that book. I finally found in on a book truck in the back, waiting to be reshelved. I took the book to her and handed it to her. The witch had the nerve to tell me, " I didn't want the book, I just wanted to make sure that it was here! Why are you giving it to me, do you want me to reshelve it?"

She went on to say that when she came in the day before, they told her it was missing. She said that she located the book on the shelf and removed it, so that she could show them( the page desk staff) that it was still in the library. Hence the reason why the book was sitting on a book truck in the back waiting to be reshelved.

That is the point where my supervisor took over. He told the patron that she was wrong for yelling at me and it would not be tolerated.

Random stories for today

This morning, in the span of 10 minutes I was told this by two different patrons.

1. African American female in her late forties: " Sharon and Bob stole my credit card information from one of the branch libraries and were buying sex with it. You know you can't buy sex in Antioch"

I couldn't respond, I was laughing so hard.

2. Anglo male was having trouble booking a computer at one of the branch libraries. I told him
log out of his record and I would help him book a computer at the reference desk. As I am
helping him, he said, " All of the staff at the branch library are CRAZY!" This was right after
he told me that while he was speaking to some police officers, they told him he was crazy
because his face was swollen.

I turned to my co-worker and asked him, "What is it that I am doing because they just keep
approaching me?"