Ummm NO!

A patron asked me if we are open on January 1st. When I said, "No," the patron said, "Well I guess it's good that y'all get a day off."

At first, I thought I was being sensitive

My co-worker then confirmed what I believed to be true.

It began a few months ago, I don't know why he picked me, but he has. This old man wobbled to the desk and just stood in front of me. I was in the middle of helping a patron, so I walked away in order to help the patron retrieve a book. When I returned to the desk, the man was still standing in the same spot. My co-worker was sitting on the opposite end of the desk doing nothing.

I finally asked, "Did you need something?" He said, "YEAH, I NEED SOMETHING!" He didn't elaborate. My co-worker finally recovered from whatever fog she was in and said, "Oh, I'm sorry, can I help you?" She did this because I was still helping the first patron.

He has done other little things to me since, but I can't remember each one. What stands out the most in my mind is how he will just stand in front of me and stare when I'm at the reference desk.

Yesterday, he returned the reference desk copy of the K.ing J.ames version of the B.ible. After I returned his identification to him, he asked me, "Do you believe in J.esus?" I said, "Un huh." I was thinking, "Of course I do, that is what has kept me from telling you off!"

Back to today. This same man approached me at the reference desk and said, "THE WORD!" I asked, "Did you want the B.ible?" He said, "Same difference, B.ible, word, whatever." I then said, "If you want the B.ible, you need to ask for it by the correct name."

When he left, I told my co-worked that the patron is always messing with me. My co-worker said, "I noticed that, he has always approached me and asked for the K.ing J.ames B.ible. For whatever reason, he just doesn't like you."

I have now decided that if possilbe, I will just walk away from the desk whenever I see that patron wobbling toward me."

It's been raining and cold

Well, cold to us is anything below 50 degrees. It's been in the 40's. When it's raining and or cold, the library fills up. About 12;30p.m., it almost looked as if it was standing room only on the floor. And the smells, I wanted to turn around and return to the staff area.

Seen and heard at the reference desk:

I saw a man walk past and it seemed as if he was digging for gold with his
pinkie finger(in his nose.) What made this sight ultra scary is that he had
on a chef's jacket.

I helped a patron and then she said to me, " You are one of my favorite
librarians, because you shush people when they get noisy." I said, "Thank
you, I think."

Being unable to recognize that you're referring to yourself

Sunday afternoon, OED man approached the reference desk and began asking my co-worker to look up words and his new obsession of phrases.

I walked away from the desk to assist a patron in locating a book. Upon my return to the reference desk, my co-worker says to me, "OED said, if we created a new department, just for the crazy people, there wouldn't be any patrons in our department." I asked my co-worker, "Is he including himself in the proposed new department?"

Sometimes you just need to step away

This happened to one of my co-workers yesterday, and he said that I should write about it here.


One of our semi-regulars approached my co-worker at the reference desk and asked, "CAN YOU HELP ME FIND A BOOK THAT WILL TELL ME HOW TO MAKE MY BEST FRIEND TURN G.AY!"

My co-workers response, "YOU NEED TO JUST GO AWAY NOW!!!!" My co-worked then walked away from the reference desk and came into the staff area. He said that he just needed to take a moment away from the desk to just breath.

Background info on the patron:

For about 3 months, he rolled into the library on a very fancy motorized chair. He would just use the computers to type about 10 signs. He would then tape the signs to the back of his chair. He would do this everyday. I was curious, so one day, I read a portion of the signs. They said, "I am looking for my boyfriend. He helps me do everything." The signs went on to describe his boyfriend in detail.

One day he just stopped. From that point on, he had a laptop whenever he came into the library. I forgot to add that he was always very dirty, head to toe.

He hadn't been in here for quite a while, and then I noticed him again, last week. He is a little cleaner, hair cut, motorized chair gone. He now has an old school wheelchair.

I didn't know it was possible

Yesterday, I saw a patron maintain his pimp stroll while using a cane. He had a mean lean to the left. The cane was in the right hand. He also did a glide/shuffle.

Today, I have angered a co-worker. It wasn't my intention. She just assumed that I would feel sympathy for her and I don't. She has gotten away with not working the schedule that she agreed to when she was hired. This has gone on for more than 6 months. She complained to me because the management has informed her that she must return to her Sunday work schedule. Her whine, "I WON'T HAVE TWO DAYS OFF IN A ROW ANYMORE!"

My reply, "I didn't have 2 days in a row off for 5 years, and I was working 3 different jobs!"

No policy against it exists, so it is allowed

This is what my supervisor told me. We were at the reference desk together. I noticed out of the corner of my eye, a man at one of the teen computers, zip lock bag in hand. He had rolling papers in the other hand that he had just lined. As I observed him rolling the joi.nt, I mentioned it to my boss, and he said, "Since there isn't a policy against a patron rolling a joint, it is allowed!"

So I now know that it is okay for folks to sit in the open and roll joints inside the library.

True Crime readers scare me!!!!!!

A petite woman approached me at the reference desk. She specifically bypassed my co-worker to get to me. Her hair was disheveled, her skin was dirty, she had glasses with coke bottle lenses, they were dirty and lopsided.

She asked, "Do you have any books on KIL.LERS."

I looked at her oddly. She then said, "You know, like Scott Peters.on, or Charles Man.son."

I asked, "Do you want one about Scott, or Charles?"

She said, " I want a book about each of them."

As I was telling her what books were available, she said, "And do you have a book about SER.IAL KIL.LERS?"

I stopped typing and looked at her. She then said, "I'm studying them."

I took her to the section and pulled the books myself. She told me as I was walking away, "I'm just going to study the books in here." I said, "Uh huh," and kept walking.

When I returned to the desk, I relayed the interaction to my co-worker. He said, "Yeah, she's studying those books so she can learn how to be a ser.ial kill.er."

In my experience, giving a man a fish will only lead to

him asking you to cook it and plan the rest of the meal while you're at it.

Monday afternoon at 4:30 p.m(I was off the desk at 5 p.m.,) a man approached the desk and asked me for hospital statistics. I removed the American Hosp.ital Statisti.cs handbook off the shelf. I opened the book to the Californ.ia hospit.al statist.ics page. I showed the information to the man. He said, "Oh, I want hospital statistics for A.frica."

I searched to see if we might have a book in our collection with that information. We didn't, so I then searched the internet. I found some statistics for a children's hospital in S.outh Africa. I printed this and showed it to the man. He said, "I want statistics for hospitals in West Africa." I searched a bit more and didn't find anything and told the man so. He then said, "I want statistics on medical schools in Africa."

My search resulted in a list of medical schools in S.outh A.frica. I showed this to the man and he said, "I want to know the costs to build a school in Africa."

This time, I found information on a foundation that provides grants for the building of elementary schools in A.frica. I also found a proposal for the building of an elementary school in S.outh A.frica. The proposal also included the cost of building a dormatory. I gave all of this information to the man and he said, " I want to know the cost of building a medical school in W.est A.frica. My brother wants to build a medical school for the area where I am from. All of the funding will come from A.merica." By this time, I had given the man 25 minutes of my time. I told him that he needed to take the information that I gave him and do further research.

He then said, "What about salaries? I need to know how much it will cost to pay the instructors." I told him that he would have to look at the websites for medical schools in S.outh A.frica and see what they are offering as salary and then make an educated guess." He then realized that I was done with him and said, "Well I guess this will have to do."