I've been meaning to mention this for about 2 weeks now

One afternoon, a patron came to the reference desk and asked me where the scrap paper is. I proceeded to show him the 3x5 pieces and pointed to the bin where the 8x11 pieces are. Before I could state why I was pointing toward the other end of the desk, he began to yell. "I DON'T WANT SMALL PIECES OF PAPER. I NEED BIG PIECES OF PAPER." I explained to him that if he had let me finish explaining where the paper is located, he would have seen the larger pieces of paper. He went to get some paper, but he first had to choose each piece of paper based on the amount of print on the opposite side. As he was doing this, another patron squeesed pass him because he was blocking a walkway. This guy began yelling, " YOU TOUCHED ME, YOU WERE TOO CLOSE! YOOOOUUUU TOUCHED MEEEE, YOOOUUU TOUCHED MEEEE!" Yet another patron yells from one of the computers, "DUDE, YOU NEED TO CHILL AND TAKE A PILL WHILE YOU'RE AT IT!" The floor supervisor picked up the telephone to call security. The patron began walking toward me again and he said, "IT'S OKAY, I HAVE A PROBLEM!" I told him, "I know." She stayed on the telephone with security, so the guy started walking away from the reference desk. He turned to me yet again and said, " I HAVE A PROBLEM!" I told him, "THAT'S OBVIOUS!" As he walked away, he said, " THE PROBLEM IS THAT THERE ARE TOO MANY MEN AND I'M WRITING A SCREENPLAY ABOUT IT!"