New Year's Eve

I started this workday with high hopes. I was hoping for peace and quiet.

It was great for me until 3:00 p.m., I had been on the desk for five minutes. All of a sudden, I hear..........A BIG BANG ONTO THE TABLE(the tables are wooden.) I think nothing of it, maybe someone dropped something on the table. ANOTHER LOUD BANG, REPEATED BY AN EVEN LOUDER BANG!!!

I walk over to the computer terminal and ask the WEIRDO if it was he making all of that noise.

He said, " Yeah, I guess that would be me."

I said, "If you bang that mouse one more time onto the table, you will have to leave this floor and use the computer on another floor!"

He said, " I was only trying to make the computer work." NOW WE ALL KNOW THAT BANGING THE MOUSE ON THE TABLE AS HARD AS YOU CAN, DOESN'T CAUSE THE COMPUTER TO RUN ANY FASTER!!! So........I turned and looked at him REAL HARD, then turned back around to return to the desk.

3:45 p.m. Different man.

Patron: I must be stupid because I can't find what I am looking for.
(I let that one slide.)
As I am searching online for the author, he asks, "What's your New Year's resolution?"

Me: "I don't make resolutions."

Patron: " Do you know what mine is?"

Me: "No, why don't you tell me.."

Patron: "To flirt with more women."

Me: no response whatsoever................birds chirping

Patron: "Oh, you're like, my resolution is to ignore people like you."

Me: still no response...................birds chirping louder and longer

I was able to located what he was looking for and sent him in the direction, that he needed to go.