Pleasantly Surprised

This morning, as I exited the staff area, I noticed a man sitting in front of a computer terminal with his hands raised.
This was such an unusual appearance. I looked at the scream while walking toward the staff elevator. The man was praying. He was watching an online ministry and he was praying with the minister.
My joy at seeing someone in one of the perv seats doing something positive was short lived.
The closer I got to the elevator, I was able to get a glimpse of the usual filth being watched online.

They got me.........I received a summons.......

The summons was for JURY DUTY! On Wednesday, the defense attorney dismissed me from jury duty.

Today, one of my co-workers informed me that Mr. Booty Shorts was able to slip past security because he was performing a "presto chango" in the restroom, once on his designated floor.

Animals in the library

I'm sure that everyone remembers the rule that says, Only Service Animals Are Allowed.
Well, I work for a "pu.nk" system. Everyone is allowed to bring their animal into the library. Security is supposed to ask if it's a "companion" animal, and the patron is supposed to show proof of such.

Management is so afraid of the possible lawsuits, so all animals are allowed to enter the building.

Yesterday, an elderly woman approached me at the reference desk and asked, "Are dogs allowed in the library?"

I told her, "They do allow them in here."

She then stated that the dog whom the owner had placed on a chair near her, was causing her to cough. Because of management, the only solution I could offer was to put her on another computer away from the animal.

Patrons/Computers@the Public Library

Thankfully, I left work @ 3:00 p.m. this past Thursday and I won't return until Wednesday November 12th.

A brother man approached me at the reference desk and said, "I reserved the computer for 2 o'clock, and it won't allow me to log-in."

I said, while looking at the time on my computer, "You need to wait....." He cut me off and said, "IT'S AFTER 2 p.m., AND THE COMPUTER WON'T LET ME LOG ON!"

I followed him to the computer terminal that he was complaining about. Low and behold, the internet was up and I told him, "All you need to do is click the start icon."

He sat down at the computer, turned to me and said, "It must have just been slow."

I turned and walked away, thinking,"Didn't I say that you needed to wait."

10 minutes later, brother man approached me again. He said, "I am trying to apply for a job online and it's saying that it doesn't recognize my address."

Once again, I followed him back to his terminal. He explained to me that he had just input his address and it's not being recognized. I looked at the screen, and saw that he had put too much information in line 1 of the address (He had typed his complete address in line 1 and continued to type everything else in the appropriate boxes.)

I told him to try removing the extra information from line 1. He did so. A message appeared. It said that he had already submitted an application and he couldn't submit another one until 11/16/2008.

I returned to the desk.

Another 5 minutes pass and brother man approached the desk again, but this time he goes over to my co-worker and whispers what happened each time he asked me for help. He told my co-worker that he didnt' understand why I didnt' stay over there and wait for him to finish. I had already told my co-worker what happened each time I went back there to help him.

My co-worker told the patron, "It isn't our job to assist you with whatever you are working on. We can help you if there is a problem with the computer, but we are supposed to be available for desk reference questions. One on one computer assistance is not something that librarians are allowed to do.

He then asks her if she will help him and says loudly, "I JUST DON'T WANT HER HELPING ME AGAIN." As they are walking toward the computer terminal, he said, "I am not computer illiterate!"

When my co-worker returned to the desk, she said, "He wanted to know why he couldn't access a web page. He didn't add .com in the address bar."

I told her, "Yet, he said that he wasn't computer illiterate!"

To possess both rudeness and laziness

I returned for the page desk and my co-worker was on the telephone. From what I could piece together, it was a reference call and she decided that the caller had been transferred to the wrong department.

My co-worker transferred the call(or so she thought,)turned to me and said, "The light is still blinking. Do you have someone on hold?" I told her no and continued to read the newspaper online.

She picked up the receiver and said, "WHO IS THIS?" She then began speaking to the person on the other line about the reference call and why the information desk staff should have more training.

Once she finished her conversation, she tells me, "That was the floor manager from upstairs. I have never met her, but she knew exactly who I was when I picked up the receiver. I can't recall ever even speaking with her on the telephone. How could she know me by voice?"

I looked at her, turned my head, and continued reading the online newspaper. If I had said all of the things running through my mind as possible answers, I would have hurt her feelings permanently.

1. There are three rude librarians in our department. 1 isn't here
today and the other has an accent.
2. You are known throughout the building for pointing out the flaws in
others, but never admiting yours.
3. A prime example is that you didn't successfully transfer that call.
Instead of admitting that you did something wrong, you said that the
patron must have hung up.

All prepared and everything

This week, I was prepared to capture those unbelievable moments with my miniature digital camera. I didn't see any of the outlandish folks.

I also found out that security banned the booty short shim from the last post.

Sights to behold

I am trying to devise a creative way in which I can capture the images that I see. There are days when I see some things that amaze me.

Wednesday before last, I saw a man walking the floor, he had on a burgundy men's t-shirt, a burgundy, pink, and brown ruffled skirt with a white lace trim. Rounding out his ensemble were pink tub socks and brown hiking boots. The highlight of my evening was the man standing next to the reference desk on the side that I was sitting, and posing. If I moved, he moved.

When my supervisor saw what was going on, he told me, "Consider yourself blessed!"

This past Thursday, I got to see what I had only heard about. A man in a woman's spaghetti strapped spandex tank top, and denim booty shorts. They looked as if he had cut them himself. His butt cheeks were exposed. The last time that he was on our floor in that attire, a supervisor approached him and told him that he was dressed inappropriately. He told the supervisor to, stay out of his business.

Do they really?

This past Sunday 20 minutes before closing, a woman aproached me at the ref desk.
She was complaining that there was a man in the L.G. Center (where she was reading) talking kind of loud to himself and just acting strange. The kicker...

She said,"I realize some people come here and stay all day everyday, because they need someplace to go. There were other people in there, but they left because of that guy."

I looked at the clock and thanked her for telling me. By the time she finished, it was 15 minutes before closing. I told her that we are quite familiar with the guy, and so is security.

Because of the time, I knew that calling security would be a waste of time. I also knew that the guy would be leaving the building within 5 minutes.

What all of the staff knows about the man who"lives" in the center is that.....
1.He thinks that the center is
only for his use.
2.He makes funny noises and
talks to himself in the hope
that he will cause others to
leave the center.
3.Security makes him leave all
of the time.
What I know about the woman who complained is that she comes here everyday and stays all day!

Incompatible activities

We the employees of this great institution have to sign an agreement that we have read this new revised policy that goes into effect Monday October 6, 2008. It basically says that we cannot use the department computers for anything that isn't work related.

My post may be even fewer and far in between. I don't feel like posting in the morning and by the time I get home in the evening, I am not thinking about the computer. I sit in front of a computer all day long, so I rarely use the one at home. I guess this new policy means that I will have to make the effort from now on.

Seen today at 4:20 p.m.

An elderly man with earplugs in both ears, yelling questions to me. As he walked away, my co-worker asked, "Why does he have plugs in his ears, if he wants to speak with others and ask questions?" I told her that I had no clue.

The man returned again, because he obviously didn't hear me clearly. He wanted to add money to his copy card. Instead of inserting his card and then adding the money, he simply put money in the machine. He kept asking me what the problem was. As first, I thought the card wasn't working because he didn't have enough money. He assured me that he added the correct amount of money to his card. I walked over to the copy machine and saw that he had in fact put the correct amount of money in the machine, but since he never put his copy card in, the money was still in the machine.

I removed the money, then inserted the copy card and added the money to the card.

When I returned to the desk, my coworker was shaking her head and laughing.

Typical telephone reference calls

"Hello, I graduated from college, can you tell me how many units I have?". My co-worker was stunned into silence for a few seconds.

"Yeah, I have a press release and I want to know if someone can tell me whether or not I should use one of the sentences."

"Is noseless a word?" I gave the answer. 2nd question..
" How do you spell Florence Night.engale's last name because it's not spelled like the bird.--This patron always calls with these crossword like questions.

"Why do I have to go into the library to read a reference book? Why can't you just look up what I need and read me the answers over the telephone.

There is always a telephone reference that annoys us.

What does it look like to you?

To ward off harrassment or having to say,"I'm not interested at ALL;" I usually wear this ring on my left ring finger. Last week, a man I had been helped for a minute (who stared me up and down the whole time,) asked me, "So, are you married."

It is so bad, that I keep the set in my wallet at all times.


This is the one I wear whenever I have on white gold accessories. Fortunately/Unfortunately, my ex-boyfriend pops in on my job enough for this to be believeable. We can usually be seen arguing.

Don't Let them get to you!

That is what a patron said to me this past Sunday. I had been on the desk a little over an hour. I was scheduled to be at the reference desk for two hours straight. We are usually scheduled for desk duty every other hour. It was kind of brutal that day.

The patron who said those words to me comes into the library almost everyday. Whenever I see him, he always has a huge smile on his face. He is able to walk with the aid of crutches.

When I saw him, I smiled as usual, but immediately afterward, I continued relaying to my co-worker what had just happened. I guess he heard the frustration in my voice.

Monday afternoon, while at the reference desk, the same man approached me at the reference desk and I began laughing. He said, "I just wanted to see how you're feeling today." I told him that I was laughing because I was remembering what he told me the day before.

Are you saying that you watch me?

As I pulled into a parking space Sunday morning, I noticed a man standing in a nearby doorway. I proceeded to park my car and gather my belongings. Once I exited the car, the man said, "WHY DO YOU AlWAYS LOOK SO MAD?". I was thinking, "Because I don't appreciate someone watching my every action". My actual response was, "It's because I don't feel like doing what I have to do!". I didn't wait for a response, I kept it moving.

Caught

I heard something that sounded like paper being torn. I looked to my right and out of the corner of my eye, I spotted one of our regulars tearing a page from a reference book. He immediately rushed to the opposite side of the table so that his next actions were not in full view of the reference desk.

I walked over to the patron and said, "Tearing pages out of our books is not allowed."

The patron gave me a very odd look, because the page he had torn was blank.

I then said, "Even if the page is blank, you are not to remove it from a book!"

The patron said, "Oh, you're not."

I said, "NO" and walked back to the reference desk. Lucky for me and not so lucky for the patron. Two floor supervisors just so happened to be at the desk. I told them of the incident. They decided that the rules would be followed and both supervisors would speak to the patron with a security guard present.

Homey stuck to his story and said, "The page is blank, what's the problem?"

They explained to the patron that he had actually destroyed library property.

The security guard took the patron away. A formal incident report was filed and the patron has been banned from all branch libraries in our system for 90 days.

I've only been at the reference desk for 40 minutes

I am done for the day. A Russ*an chick just came to the desk looking for Confessions of A Video Vi*en and or The Vi*en Diaries.

Don't you just love your job

That's what a patron asked me today. What he actually said was........


"Don"t you just love your job? It just seems like so much fun."

I said, "Um, no!"

Patron: "Why not?"

Me: "It's actually a mixture between a halfway house and a homeless shelter."

Yesterday's funny

It came from the public elevator area. I know the voice I heard was that of a woman, but I can't tell you if she was on a cellular telephone or speaking with a live person.

This is what I heard:

I'M CRAZY!!!!! BIT*H, YOU THE ONE ON MEDICATION!!!!!

I couldn't help myself, I just laughed so hard. My supervisor, on the other hand, ran over there to see if he could defuse the situation. By the time he got there, the woman was in the elevator and you could still hear the conversation. We actually heard it all the way down to the first floor.

The incident that caused my need to leave the bldg

Background informaiton on my co-worker.

This is a becky in her fifties. She only works 20 hrs. per week period.
She complains at her desk, while at the reference desk, and anyplace else
where she has an audience.
She complains about work, having to commute to work, her house, her property
taxes, the patrons, if she has to work extra time on the reference desk.

I hadn't been assigned to work with this woman on the reference desk for
months. Why you ask, because I complained about her not doing her job while
at the reference desk.

This past Monday, we were scheduled to work the reference desk together for the 11-12 hour. For the first 30 minutes, one of our regulars sat at one of the laptop tables and held a LOUD conversation on his cellular telephone. He was so loud, that I heard him clearly. Since he was sitting on her side of the room, I tried not to say anything to him or her.

After 20 minutes, I left the desk. I went in the back to rant to another co-worker(his desk is in front of hers.) I returned to the reference desk and sat through 10 more minutes of the guy talking on the cell phone and my co-worker giving patrons incorrect information.

I finally said, while getting up from my seat and walking over to wear the guy was, "YOU KNOW THAT YOU CAN HEAR HIM AND I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU HAVEN'T SAID ANYTHING!"When I reached the guy, he of course had ended his call(He ended it the minute he saw me get up.) I told him,"YOU KNOW BETTER!" When I returned to the desk, this LAZY WOMAN said, "You know, you're much younger than me, so of course you heard him." I simply said, "If I could hear his whole conversation clearly, I know that you heard him." I saw this woman look at dude when he first began his conversation, they made eye contact and she turned her head.

She tried to make small talk with me after that, but I simply ignored her.

A glimpse at what management can and will do

Sally Stern-Hamilton’s controversial book, The Library Diaries, written under the pseudonym Ann Miketa, resulted in her termination July 25 as a Mason County (Mich.) District Library employee after 15 years on the job. Written in the first person and set in what she calls the Lake Michigan town of Denialville, the book, produced by print-on-demand publisher PublishAmerica, is a series of fictional vignettes about mostly unsavory characters encountered daily at the library....
Ludington (Mich.) Daily News, Aug. 9

This is one of my fears of what can happen while working in the library.


Police continue to look for a man suspected of sexually assaulting a 10-year-old girl in the restroom of the Riverview branch of the St. Paul (Minn.) Public Library August 13. Police say the man talked to the girl briefly before following her into a restroom in the basement. Officers obtained a search warrant for the library’s computers to see whether any of the users were sex offenders or matched the suspect’s description....
St. Paul (Minn.) Pioneer Press, Aug. 15