This is what I get for leaving work early yesterday!

This is what was in front of my cubicle when I arrived to work today. I am supposed to go through each and every one of these and determine if we should keep it or toss it. I feel like chucking the whole cart. They are VERY DUSTY and some look as if they will fall apart as soon as I touch them.

My Wednesday at work ended on a negative note

Nine out of ten times, I usually upset a patron when they ask for something and I refuse to do it.

Well, we have temporary passes for use of the computer. They are only given out if something goes terribly wrong with the computer. If the computer has stopped working properly because of patron error, they aren't automatically given a pass, so that they can have additional time on the computer(This seems to be only a rule on my floor, according to the patrons.)

So this old Becky asked for my assistance with her computer. She said that it was acting up. I saw that she had done something to the computer, but I couldn't figure out what, so I just rebooted it. As I was rebooting the computer, she asked, "Can I have one of those numbers?"
I said, "No."

She thought that I didn't understand her, because her next statement was this. "I mean one of those temporary passes." I said, " I know what you meant and I am not going to give you one."

She then said, "WHY NOT? I HAVE BEEN NOTHING BUT NICE TO YOU!" I began to say, " It's not the policy........." She cut me off and yelled even louder, "SOMEONE IS GOING TO GIVE ME A PASS NOW!" I tried to explain that she still had 35 minutes left on her card and she didn't need a pass. She kept yelling, so I walked back to the reference desk. She promptly marched over to my co-worker(another old Becky.)

My coworker to her to just use another computer, once the one that she had been on had finished rebooting.

This woman waited until I left the desk, then asked my replacement how to go about filing a formal compliment.

If you hear loud voices, or any type of commotion, check the 3rd Floor first.

It is a running joke that our floor is the one where the most incidents occur. This happened about two weeks ago.

A half shim approached me at the reference desk( half because he had on all male clothes, pumps, and his long blonde wig was twisted.) You could tell that this was a man who had just thrown on a wig. You could see his bad attempt at streaks. His natural hair looked as if instead of blonde streaks, he got blonde dots. He had shaved his head a bit, but the spots were still obvious and the wig just wasn't covering it.

Now he complained that he was being harassed while sitting in the Gay/Lesbian Center. My boss was at the desk with me, and we thought it may have been a regular who doesn't like anyone to be in the center while he is in there.

My boss went into the center and spoke with the man who was in there. He asked him to leave because it had been reported that he was harassing another patron.

Two minutes later, a man comes walking past the reference desk. As he is walking by, he is yelling, "I F**KS WIT B*TCHES, I DON'T FU**S WIT MEN! YOU BETTA GET THAT STRAIGHT, I FU**S WIT B*TCHES, NOT MEN!"

I turned to my boss and said, "Oh, I guess that's why he was hanging out in the Gay/Lesbian Center and harassing a shim!"

What happens when security doesn't do what they are called to do?

Last week, I just happened to be in the staff area behind the reference desk. A female patron was cursing at a male librarian and calling him everthing but his birth name.

Following proceedure, the librarian called security so that the patron could be escorted from the building.

Security arrived, dude determined that the patron was cute, and said, "Oh, okay, I'll help you."

That was the second incident in two weeks, where the security guard decided the patron was cute, so she was allowed a free pass from acting out.

My new quest

Last week, I thought it was a fluke. It happened again today. Now, I am on a mission to find this patron and get them banned from the library.



There is a bank of 5 computers in the back corner of our floor( I am told that a section like this exist on the 5th floor also.) It is a section were the perverts usually hang. A patron approached me Thursday afternoon. She couldn't log onto the computer. I went over there and discovered that the patron who used the computer prior, had disconnected all of the wires. This was annoying more than anything. I reconnected the wires, turned the computer on, and walked away.



Fast forward to today. A patron complained that she couldn't log onto the computer. This time, it looked as if everything was intact, but there was no connection to the server. I submitted a req. form and called a technician. The technician discovered that the ethernet cable had been disconnected and then tangled into the other cables. The technician was frustrated because he first had to untangle the cables, then reconnect them.



The technician advised me to locate the patron and explain the seriousness of the crime. He also said to explain that the patron would be banned if the behavior continued. I told the technician that I was one step ahead of him and had already set the wheels in motion to catch our thoughtful patron.

Words that women just love to hear, NOT!

Said as I was approaching the entrance to the library this morning........."Mmm mmm, you look real good." All said by a grimy looking bum who is here everyday that I'm here. Thankfully, he isn't always on the floor that I work on. Please believe that he is always outside waiting for those doors to open.

I always wonder, "What makes a bum think that I long to hear anything lustful come out of his mouth in reference to ME?"

Six quirks/events of mine........I was tagged

1. Link the person who tagged you.... I was tagged by

Opinionated Diva

2. Mention the rules in your blog.
3. Tell about 6 quirks/events of yours.
4. Tag 6 bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged bloggers blogs, letting them know that they have been
tagged.

1. I hate to drive/commute! I will if I have to, but I am never happy when driving long
distances.

2. I don't (gasp) eat watermelon. When I was 10, my dad forced me to eat the equivalent of one
very large watermelon. I ate so much that I was sick. I am reminded of that incident each
and every time I see watermelon.

3. My sister was pure evil to me while I was growing up (she is 7 years older.) Her payback has
been that once her oldest daughter turned 13, she began to resemble me more and more.

4. It irritates me when people who have jobs with generous benefit plans don't get their grills
fixed.

5. If I see someone I know and it is obvious that they don't recognize me, rest assured, I will not
try to make them notice me. I am good for avoiding aunts/cousins in the mall, the bank, etc.

6. About 17 years ago, I sufferred a concussion. A young man attempted to mug me outside of
my appartment. I refussed to release my hold on my purse. Because of my resistence, I
was drug a few feet. My neighbors at the time were nosey as all get out, but not one of them
came to their windows that night. I got up, went inside and called 911 myself.


****I am not tagging anyone else.****

Ben siting at your local libary

Monday night, I was on the reference desk for the last hour before closing. After the closing annoucement and the last patron had left the floor, I did my usual. I went to the restroom before preparing to go home.

On my way back to my desk from the restroom, who/what do I spot running from the compact book stacks to the support staff area, but non other than Ben. He was moving REAL FAST!!!

I was both shocked and surprised. I have heard the rumors, but I had never seen any proof.

After telling my co-worker yesterday, he asked, "So, did you scream?" Of course I didn't.

He went on to say that our co-workers had reported seeing quite a few since the renovations of the first floor occurred. I replied, " Gee, thanks for that visual."

Race, class, entitlement

A man walked up to the reference desk and threw the information slip that we give out regarding cellular telephone use on our floor on the desk in front of me. He then stated, " I DON'T SEE WHAT THE DIFFERENCE IS."

I was working on the computer, so I stopped and looked at the patron. I then said, " What are you talking about."

Patron: "That! I don't see a difference."

Me: "A difference, what are you talking about."

Patron: "Talking in the library."

Me: "What do you mean? Do you mean the difference between someone talking on a cellular telephone and what?"

Patron: "Between talking on a cell phone and just talking loudly!" Those people next to me are talking loudly.

* I didn't hear anything at the desk. I walked over to where he was sitting and didn't hear anything on my way over there. Yes, three people were talking, but they were speaking in low tones and even when standing next to then, I couldn't hear them clearly.

So the first thing I said to the patron is, " You should have just told me that you had a problem with the people talking next to you, instead of throwing that sheet of paper in my face( my head was facing down and he threw the paper in a way in which it landed directly in my line of vision.)

We went back and forth on that for a minute. Since I didn't hear anything, I told him so and returned to the desk. Here is where race, class, and entitlement comes into the picture.

The patron was melanin challenged and middle aged. The people he complained about were an African American male, a melanin challenged woman, her melanin challenged son, and the couple's biracial infant. They looked to be late twenties to early thirties. The woman's son was a teenager. The patron bypassed a melanin challenged librarian in order to approach me. At that point, I maintained the opposite side of the room from where he was sitting. He insisted that I check on his complaint. He was fuming when I didn't see things his way.

My post just for Opinionated Diva

A while back, you suggested that I use a mask when dealing with the old dusty and sometimes moldy books. Well, I have been having trouble with my asthma lately(no attacks, just tightness in the lung area.) My allergist and the nurse who is assigned to help you manage my asthma have both advised me that I must wear a mask whenever examining the books.

The last thing the nurse said was something for me to seriously consider. She said, "Maybe this isn't the best place for you to work."

As a sophomore in college, I worked as a library page. I worked at one of the older branches. The place was dusty and moldy. After about 9 months of working there, I decided to get tested for allergies. The results were that I was allergic to all grasses, dust, dust mites, all animals, and all trees. I quit that job and began working various office jobs.

I still like working in the field of libary science, but I will probably seek out something behind the scenes. It is probably time for me to stop dealing with patrons and books on a daily basis.

One thing I hate, oh so much

Being kind and courteous no matter what.

A patron walks up to you at the reference desk, no problem right? Wrong. The patron is filthy. You see dirt all over the face, the clothes seem as if they've never seen soap nor water; and to top it off, the worst of all, the hands and fingernails are black.

The patron asks you a reference question, and you must answer without showing the obvious disgust on your face.

Piss Alley

That is what I deemed one section on our floor yesterday. On one side of the reference desk, it seemed as if all of the regulars who seem to have bladder problems decided to sit real close to each other.

The only way to avoid the horrible smell was to walk all the way around the area. In lieu of that, I tried to hold my breath while I walked past.

How many parents does it take to bring a teenager to a FREE SAT workshop?

The answer must be plenty. This system offers free SAT workshops to high school juniors and seniors twice yearly. It never fails, for the first session, more parents than teenagers show up. The parents were running around trying to get directions to the meeting room where the session would be held. The teens on the other hand were casually walking in circles. I finally approached the teens and told them where they needed to be.

That was Sunday. Monday was a holiday for our school district. There was a parent in here with her child, but the parent was completing the homework assignment. The child was looking on clueless.

I know you been thinking about me

This is what a patron said when he approached me at the reference desk.

I asked him to repeat himself. I gave him a very odd look and said,
UM......NO!
The patron said, "You are looking at me as if I have lost my mind."

That is exactly what I was thinking!

He goes on to say that he is looking for a book that he can't find because we keep moving books on this floor.

The patron told me the title of the book that he was looking for, but because he was trying to sound sexy and whisper, I couldn't quite understand what he was saying. Finally, it dawned on me that dude was trying to flirt. I said, "IF IT IS THE SAME BOOK THAT I HELPED YOU FIND BEFORE, IT IS IN THE SAME PLACE IT WAS THE LAST TIME THAT YOU WERE LOOKING FOR IT."
Patron: Yeah, it's a three volume set and if you aren't familiar with it, you need to familiarize
yourself with it.

Me: Yeah well, it's right over there were it has been since the books were shifted.

I guess I was supposed to be turned on because this fool comes into the library to read
Universal Seduction.

I have debated with myself in regards to this post

Last week, the staff was in shock due to what occurred the previous Friday. Not one, but two overdoses.

#1 11:00 a.m. outside the building on the stairs surrounding the building. Paramedics weren't
able to revive the idividual.

#2 Found at 6:05 p.m. in the 1st flr Men's Restroom by a custodian. Paramedics were called and
once again, they weren't able to revive the individual.

I had never known it to be so bad around here in one day. Thursday of last week, I received an e-mail from a friend of mine who manages a branch library in a neighboring city. The contents of that e-mail took me back to my days of working as a Children's Librarian in the hood.

She wrote:

Nexgrl, I am so sorry that I haven't called or responded to your e-mail, but it has
been quite hectic around here. The was a major drug bust at one of the houses
across the street. They arrested a lot of men and confiscated a lot of product and
weapons. The police had the streets surrounding the library blocked and we were
not permitted to leave the premisis for quite some time.
(the next paragraph is what did it for me)

That same week, a man attempted to rape an elderly woman inside the library. He
tried to drag her down the stairs into the basement. We heard her screams, called the
police and the library assistant ran after the assailant. He caught him, and held him until
the police arrived.
I was so sad for my friend and what everyone had gone through, especially the elderly
woman. This week, one of my co-workers told me that my friend's brand new Children's
Librarian quit on the spot because she didn't like the way the attempted rape was handled
by staff (Clearly, this is a woman who only took the job working in the hood until something
better came along. She just didn't expect to see violence up close and personal.) Prior to
hiring that woman, my friend had gone about six months working as the only librarian
because no one wanted to take a job working at that branch.

***Update: My friend sent me another e-mail. She wanted to clarify. Her former Children's
Librarian was raised in the same neighborhood as the library is located. She was never
exposed to that type of violence, having only gone to private schools. I went to private
schools also, but I saw all kinds of stuff going to and from school.

Just wrong for no reason

Today has been a succession of patrons approaching me with the wrong information.

1. Patron: Do you have anything on syrian theology

Me: Do you know how to spell syrian (at that point, I didn't know what she was saying.)

Patron: I think that it is s-y-r-i-c.

I did a quick google search to see if I could figure out what she was talking about. I gave
the patron the correct spelling.

Patron: I read about it and I want more information.

Everything that I found was a reference copy only and the patron got ticked with me. I told her
good luck and walked away.

2. Patron: I can't seem to find this book. Can you look in the computer and see if the book is
available.
I conducted a search in the online catalog and no such number is in the system.

Me: Do you know the title of the book?

Patron: NO!

Me: I am only asking because this call number is either not complete, or it is wrong.

Patron: WELL, THIS IS THE NUMBER THAT THE LIBRARIAN DOWNSTAIRS GAVE ME!

Me: Do you know what the subject is?

Patron: Hispanic prison gangs, I am writing a..........(I stopped her and said, "I don't need to
know all of that, I just need the subject that you are looking for.")

I found the correct call number for the book that she wanted. I then walked with her over to the section and pulled the book off the shelf for her.

Patron: I ALREADY HAVE THAT BOOK! I told that librarian that I already have that title.

There were other books with similar subject matter, so I showed her how to look in the index for her subject. She still had the same funky attitude, so I walked away.

There were a few others, but those two stood out. Maybe the fact that they copped an attitude as soon as I showed them their error was the reason they nor I was having any luck.

Sometimes I wish this stuff was make believe

This man approached me at the reference desk. He had headphones on his head, the kind they wore in the 70's, while listening to the stereo. The chord was just drapped around his neck. He said...........WHY DO ALL THE CLOCKS AROUND HERE SAY 1:00 something, isn't it daylight savings or something like that.

My response: Yes

Patron: Shouldn't the clocks reflect 2:00 something?

Me: No, they have the correct time.

Patron: Are you sure, shouldn't they change the clocks.

Me: They obviously changed the clocks.

Patron: While looking at this cellular telephone. Well, I guess my phone must have changed on
it's own.

My co-worker looked at me and burst out laughing. I told her that I can't believe my friends think I make this stuff up?????

Strange is never ending

Yesterday afternoon, I was at the reference desk with my supervisor. I was telling him about an article I was reading online. A patron walks past and tells me to SHUT UP! Just in case I wasn't sure, he looked me dead in my face.

The same patron proceeded to walk around the reference desk. He was eyeing women up and down as he walked.

My supervisor asked me what I wanted to do. I told him that I wanted to see if there was something wrong with the patron. My supervisor went in search of the patron. As the patron rounded the reference desk for the second time, he looked at me and placed his index finger to his lips and said, "Ssshhh." He then went to a table not far from me to sit down.

My supervisor began to question the patron about his actions. The patron began yelling and telling my supervior that maybe he needed to go downstairs and speak with security.

I called security and told them to send someone up so that they could escort the patron out of the building.

I was helping another patron when security arrived. On my way back to the reference desk, I passed the security guard, my supervisor, and the patron talking. Dude had the nerve to say as I was passing that he did not tell me to shut up. I did that 'Linda Blair' turn, with my hands on my hips and said, "YES, YOU DID TELL ME TO SHUT UP!" The security guard peeped my attitude, and told the patron, "Let's go."

That's is only one incident, it was like that all afternoon yesterday.

The ugly part of my job

I know some of you may think that there's no risk in librarianship.

I was chilling at my desk this morning, surfing the internet and what not. The floor manager calls(my telephone almost never rings,) he asked me to meet him at the reference desk. I panicked, thinking that the desk schedule had been changed and I was supposed to be out there working.................WRONG!

The floor manager and one of the full-time pages asked me to follow them into the stacks. We w walked toward the books that are in my ordering section. I'm thinking that a patron must have destroyed some of the books and just left them lying on the floor.

They both pointed to a stain on the ceiling. The manager pulled a book from the shelf and showed it to me. The pages were BLACK. There were a total of ten books with BLACK MOLD. Obviously, the leak was there long before I arrived at this job. Because that is my section, I had to notate the book information so that I could attempt to re-order the titles.

After a 3 day break

My first hour on the desk this morning. One of the public terminals had an 'Out of Order' sign posted. A patron looked at the sign, and proceeded to move it and examine the monitor. I walked over to the terminal and told the patron, " The sign is posted for a reason." I returned the sign to the original position. The patron's response, "You don't even know what I did!"

I said, "I saw you move the sign and look at the screen." I returned to the reference desk.

2 minutes passed. I received a call from the computer room. They informed me that the problem had been corrected on the 'Out of Order' terminal. I went over to the terminal and removed the sign.....................................The same offending patron said to me, "I THOUGHT THE SIGN WAS POSTED FOR A REASON!!!!"

I turned slightly and said, "It was posted for a reason, but I received a telephone call, tellling me that the problem had been fixed. IF YOU MUST KNOW THE REASON!!!!"

As soon as I returned to the desk, my co-worker said, "I knew he was going to get it the minute he said something smart to you."

What's that smell?????

Let me start by saying that I have a serious sinus headache today. I probably should have stayed at home, but I just couldn't do it.

Everything was fine the first hour. Halfway into the second hour, it began to smell like the office had turned into a sewage plant. The engineers had the nerve to proclaim that it's not bad. My boss sent out an e-mail and it has been discovered that the smell is in the work area on three out of six floors.

So the smell in the back was messing with my sinuses. I get on the floor and two teenage girls sit near the reference desk and proceed to talk and giggle loudly during my first hour on the desk. For the first half hour, I tried to suck it up. I was thinking that the noise level seemed louder to me because of the headache. Finally, I had to say something to them. To my surprise, all of the adults looked at me with relief on their faces.

I'm amazed at least once per week. And that is an understatement!

Yesterday evening, while trying to exit the employee exit/entrance, I couldn't get the door open. I pushed once, I pushed even harder the second time. The person behind me said, "What's the problem? Is there someone standing there?" By the second question, I had proceeded to open the other side of the door. My answer was, "Yes!"

There was a man hovering near the security scan. He was urinating! There were three of us who exited the building. A couple was walking past and the woman said to me, "You should have pushed REAL HARD, knocking that fool over."

They say that I will get used to this behavior, but I think NOT!!

A patron calls, they want to know if a particular book can be located. I place the patron on hold. I look on all of the shelves and all of the book trucks because there are tons. It can take anywhere from 2 to 10 minutes, it depends on the call number............The book is finally found, I return to the desk.............the patron has hung up.

Sometimes they call back while you are on the desk, sometimes they don't. Today, the woman called back with some excuse about her cell phone died (she spoke with my co-worker.) She then called back ten minutes later to request another book.

This time, I told her that I was helping a patron. I took her telephone number and told her that I would call her back once I found the book.

One of the regulars got mad at me and left!

I wasn't offended, it didn't make me mad, I just laughed.

One of the regulars who never wants to leave the floor until everyone else has, kept talking loudly. At first, I thought he was talking to someone, that is until I walked toward him. He looked my way as I got closer to him and I (in typical librarian fashion,) placed my index fingers over my lips.

The patron lowered his voice, but he kept talking. I was fine with that.........until, five minutes had passed and he was back to talking loudly. I got up once again to go over to him, he saw me and got quiet. Five more minutes passed, once again, he begain to get louder and louder. My boss said, "Just call security." I told my boss not to call security, because I thought the guy would lower his voice. He turned, saw us talking, and quieted once again. Five more minutes passed and he got loud. I got up, he looked at me and I placed my fingers over my lips. This time, dude mean mugged me, turned around, picked up his belongings and left.

What's been keeping me busy

For the past two weeks, my co-worker and I have been working on catching a couple. We were talking a while back and we compared notes. There is a couple that come here everyday(what's new,) and stay online.

I've mentioned this before, each person is allowed 1 hr. per day, unless they are using the 15 min. express stations.

Well, I would notice them using the computers by the staff elevator whenever I went outside. I guess they noticed me watching them, because they began switching up their routine. My co-worker said that he had noticed the same thing.

I began tracking the guy through the library online security system. When I told him about his identification theft once, he tried to challenge me. I decided to let it go because the computer time was almost up. I waited to see if he would use a third person's I.D., but he didn't that time.

I alerted my supervisor and he began a file on them. Yesterday was a bit of a breakthrough. I caught the female on the internet during a time when she shouldn't have been. She had hacked into the system. Since she exited the system and the floor without any problems, we just put the documentation into the folder.

What's so funny about this whole situation is that we usually have this problem with children. We suspect that they have multiple library cards also.

I was tagged

I don't know if there is a title to this tag.

1. At what age do you wish to marry?

I honestly thought that I would marry by the age of 35, but that didn't happen.

2. What color do you like most?

Most times, ice blue

3. Where is the place that you want to go the most?

Egypt

4. Which part of you do you hate the most?

I don't always go with my gut instinct.

5. When you encounter a sad moment, what do you do?

I am usually reflective for a while, I may speak about it, but I usually just get over it.

6. What are you afraid to lose the most?

Like b.good, my health

7. If you win $1 million, what would you do?

Pay down my mortgage, pay off my equity line, and purchase another home.

8. How did you celebrate the New Year?

I haven't celebrated the New Year in about 20 years. When I would go out in the past,
something would always happen (Shootings, Fights, Stabbings, etc.)

9. Til now, what is the moment that you regret the most?

Settling, when I purchased my first home.

10. Which type of person do you hate the most?

Once again, I have to second what b.good said. Liars and bullshitters.

11. What is your ambition?

I had hopped to be a City Librarian one day. The longer I stay in this profession, the more
I want to become self-employed.

12. If you had one wish what would you wish for?

I wish that my previous relationship hadn't turned into a lawsuit.

13. Name one of your body parts your hubby or boyfriend tells you he adores:

I don't have either. A former boyfriend used to tell me that he loved my forehead.

14. What is the best gift that you can give someone this year?

I might stop giving out gifts this year.

15. List two things you have vowed to stop doing forever:

a) giving folks the benefit of the doubt.
b) perming my hair--so far, it's been 2 1/2 years

16. What do you need to do this year in order for you to be happier in life?

I need for dude to settle this lawsuit out of court.

17. What was the best lesson you learned in 2007(be specific)?

Sometimes you have to use the clout that you have in order to get
your desired results. Doctors brushed off my complaints until I sought
a second opinion from my brother. He then got the ball rolling and made
them find out what was really happening with my leg.

18. In this very moment, are yo doing what you thought you'd be doing at this stage in your
life?
I thought that I would be working in this field, but I never thought that I would work in
a public library.

19. If you could do over any moment or decision in your life, what would it be?

To continue what was said in response to #9. I would have purchased a home
that I loved in a location that I loved the first time around.

20. What current life decision is troubling you the most?

Where do I want to move to next and how can I make it happen.

I am now supposed to tag 8-10 people, but it's not going to happen. If any of you decide to take this on, here are the rules.
Remove 1 question from above, and add in your personal question, make it a
total of 20 questions, then tag 8-10 people in your list. List the individuals at
the end of your post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been
tagged.

Can you tell that I don't do chain letters or e-mails?

I heard some children talking

I heard this voice say, "I'mma tell you how long! It was like 1990, that's how long ago!" When the voices came into sight, it was three boys. They looked to be about 6, 8, and 14 years of age and it was the youngest who had been speaking.

I thought, "Yeah, 1990 would seem like a long time ago to them."

Patron humor

She may have not meant the statement to be funny, but I found it extremely funny.

Two patrons were standing at the bank of elevators, waiting for one of them to open up.

The woman says to the man, "I know who you are, you are the one who laughs at me everytime
that you see me!!!!" He didn't respond, he just walked toward the
stairs.

I was sitting at the reference desk and burst into laughter. My co-worker asked me what happened. I explained the scenario to her and she said, "Oh, I know exactly who you are talking
about and proceeded to describe the lady to a t."

What is funny is that both the man and the woman are strange. She walks the floor the whole time that she is here, talking/mumbling to herself. She is short, round, and always slightly hunched over. He is about 5'7", and rail thin. He also walks the floor talking/mumbling to himself whenever he is here. They both use the internet and constantly yell at the computer monitor. I thought neither one of them should have anything to say about the other.

Don't ever wonder why the librarian looks tired!!!

The patron approached the reference desk with an open road atlas in hand. He was looking at the state of Oregon. He said, "I want to know the distance from Seattle to Cannon Beach in Oregon. I don't know how to read maps."

I ask, "What is it that you want me to do."

Patron: "I want to know the distance in miles."

I start the online search. In the middle of the search, the patron says, "I want the driving directions from Seattle to Cannon Beach. Can you print that out for me?"

I did just as he asked. Then........Patron, "I want to search one more item."

I respond, "No, I asked what was it you wanted me to do and I did just that. If you want to locate anything else, consult the road atlas that you have in front of you."

The patron exclaims, "I CAN'T SEE TOO WELL, I CAN'T FIND OLYMPIA."

I told the patron: "You are looking at the state of Oregon, you need to look at the state of Washington."

The patron began to argue with me: "No, it is in Oregon. I know what I am talking about!"

I didn't say anything. I then went to wake up a patron who was sleeping at one of the reference tables.

When I returned to the desk, the patron said, "You are right, I need to look at the state of Washington."
This patron comes in here everyday and goes from librarian to librarian to see how
many online searches each of us will do for him.

Finally, he said to me, "I can't breathe in here, it is something going on with the air in here."

I said, " Maybe you should go outside."

Patron, "Can you breathe in here?"

Me: "Yes."

He finally walked away.

That woman has added me to the list of those who hate

Yesteray afternoon, I arrived to the reference desk a little early. The rude/bitter librarian was helping a patron, so I relieved the other librarian. When I returned from behind the desk, chic was still helping a patron. As I sit down, I look up and she stopped mid-sentence, looked at the clock and then at me, and then walked away. She didn't say anything to me or the patron. The patron then approached me and asked me to clarify what the other librarian had just told her.

I asked the patron, "Didn't the other librarian explain to you where you need to go?"

Patron, "She just stopped talking and walked away, so I came to ask you."

I showed the patron where she needed to go, and returned to the desk. I looked at the clock and it was 4:58 p.m. I was heated, I wanted to go in the back and confront the librarian about what she had just done her work day ends at 5:00 p.m.) The problem was that me leaving the reference desk would mean that it would have been unattended.

The standard proceedure is that you are not to leave the desk until someone is there to relieve you. It doesn't matter if your work day has ended or not. I wouldn't have had a problem with her leaving if she had told me or asked me if it was okay, but she didn't.

Our supervisor is on vacation and the manager leaves at 5:00 p.m. So, this morning even though I had planned on a mental health day, I forced myself to come to work. I told the manager what happened and have now added my name to the list of librarians who hate this woman.

I told one of my co-workers last week that we need to devise a plan to get her to leave. She isn't doing us any good.

From the mouth of an addict

A man stumbled up to the desk. He looked at me and stumbled over to the ederly lady who looked like him. He began mumbling something about the railing fell.

She fell right into his trap. What are you saying? Can you show me exactly where this occured? ( Istopped listening, until it seemed as if she believed him.)

I watched them walk away together. He was stumbling and swaying from side to side. The other librarian returned to the desk shortly afterward. She was shaking her head and mumbling that something was wrong with that patron.

She then asks me what she should do. I told her to call security. She didn't take my advice.

10 minutes passed and she tells me that she is going to walk around and check for him because she hadn't seen the patron.

I kept my eyes on the computer screen and told her that he was probably in the reading center in the back corner.

She returned to the desk and reported that the patron had climbed on one of the tables and was sleeping.

The Temporary Part-time As Needed Librarian(who works in this department every week:)
What should I do?

Me: Call security like I told you earlier.

Security comes. As the guard escorts the patron to the elevators, the patron says to the guard, " I just laid down to get a good rest!"

I feel like a broken record today

I found myself repeating the same thing over and over. The first floor is being prepared for the grand re-opening.

These are the questions that were asked at the reference desk

Young Patron: Where are the fiction books?

Old Patron: Why can't I find the book, when it says check the shelf in the catalog?

Everyone in between:
Where are all of the books?

Does that sign mean that I can't browse the books on the first floor?

Can I go downstairs and get the book that I want?

Why are they moving the books?.......You get the picture, the questions went on and
on.
There are signs posted at the end of each stack where the fiction used to reside. The sign basically says that all fiction is in the process of being relocated to the first floor. The books are unavailable for browsing until January 16th.

My response to each question"

All fiction is being moved to the first floor. They are in the process of moving the
remaining sections today. The first floor will open to the public on January 16th.
If you know the title of the book, you can request and it will be pulled and placed on
the hold shelves for you. It will be easier if the title you want can be found at one of
the branches.
Even if the patron was standing directly behind someone I gave that statement, they would then approach the desk and ask....................So I would have to repeat the statement all over again. My co-workers were doing the exact same thing.

****Yes, O.Diva, this is an instance where "READING IS FUNDAMENTAL."

Playas in the library

This dude approached me at the desk and said he was looking for his friend. He said, "You may know who he is, he has come up to you and asked you numerous questions whenever he is here."

My response, "Nope! Who doesn't come up here asking numerous questions?"

I asked him if he had looked on the other floors. He said, "His favorite floor is this one and he isn't answering his cell phone."

Next dude asked me, "Do you know where the PLAYAS SPOT is in the library?"

I said, " in the corner in the back."

He said, "You got the corner in the back part right, but it's on the 5th floor."

I asked him if he had looked for his friend on the 5th floor. He told me his friend wasn't a PLAYA, he only thinks that he is.

My co-workers let the drama from '07 merge into the new year

It began the week before Christmas. I heard through the grapevine that two women had words. Around December 26th, one was complaining about the other using her cell phone. Now the one complaining was rude and out of line, I will agree with that one. The rude librarian is consistent in her funky attitude, she gives patrons and her co-workers the same treatment.

Sunday, my boss suddenly changes the desk schedules for this week because two people simply can't work together. See, this is the problem the rude librarian doesn't always give patrons the correct information because she is too lazy to search for the correct answers or she is just confident that what she says is right. Well Saturday, one of the librarians who is feed up with her mess called her on it, in front of a patron. Attitudes have been on and poppin since.

Monday arrives and I am stuck on the desk with the rude librarian. Our supervisor brought a patron over and asked that she help with computer access. This heffa sat at the reference desk and yelled the instructions to the patron..........The next patron approaches and I don't know what was said, but she told the patron to ask me. It was a flash drive issue and I simply told the patron to bring it to me and I would print out her document. In the middle of dealing with that issue........she sent another patron my way.

The first patron ended up asking the third patron for help because I was busy.......She said extra loud, "I DON'T KNOW WHY THAT LADY IS WORKING THE DESK, BECAUSE SHE IS NO HELP WHATSOEVER!" Ol girl didn't even blink an eye, she just keep surfing real estate on the net.
I asked the rude librarian what the third patron wanted and she told me," Oh, something about cut and paste. I told her to ask you." I went over to the patron and helped her. On my way back to the desk, I helped the first patron once again.

As I was showing someone else how to use the online catalog, the patron with the flash drive issue walked over. She stopped in front of me and said, "Thank you so much, that other Librarian was..." I stopped her and said, " I know, I know." At that point, I had been hearing about her stank attitude too much for one hour.

It is now four librarians who have requested not to be scheduled to work the reference desk at the same time as the rude librarian. I feel so sorry for the librarian who does the daily reference desk schedules.

Why do folks have the nerve to challenge when they are way wrong?

My first hour on the desk and it's lunch time. This man exits the bank of elevations with a B.K. special in hand(it's across the street.) He stopped at the wi-fi table and spoke with a man on a laptop while chewing. He hands over a B.K. bag, still chomping down. I walked over to him and told him that eating isn't allowed in the library. This is what he said......."Well, can I finish my burger???"

I told the patron that he needed to go outside to finish his burger.

Dude proceeded to sit down at the laptop. He initially placed the burger in his backpack. When he was sure that I wasn't paying attention, he slipped a large portion into his mouth.

At first, I was going to call security. I changed my mind and walked over to inform him that if I caught him again, I was calling security so that he could be escorted out of the building.

Dude said, "I'M NOT EVEN EATING!!!"
The second burger was on the table next to him, so he held it up for me to
examine.
I said, " I saw you place the burger in your mouth."

He let out a loud sigh. I just walked away.

Monday December 24th, 4:55 p.m.

A patron approached the desk and asked..............WHAT TIME DOES THE LIBRARY OPEN
TOMORROW?
My co-worker and I both answered, "We are closed tomorrow!" Like almost every other place, there were signs posted at all around in all languages.

Reason #1

Yesterday afternoon, I was at the reference desk with the floor manager. A woman approached the floor manager and asked him if he had seen her daughter. This is what I heard before I tuned the conversation out..........

Parton, "I dropped my daughter off because I had a meeting and told her that I would pick her
up in two hours, she is 14. In the meantime, I lost my cellular telephone and I
have been calling her from pay telephones. She hasn't answered any of the times
that I tried to reach her."

I tuned them out because I had too many comments.....

1. She is 14, she could have stayed at home.

2. What makes you think that she is still at the library if you said that you
would pick her up in two hours. You didn't walk her in here and show her
where you wanted her to wait, how do you know that she even came in here?

3. She probably isn't answering the calls from the pay telephone because she
doesn't answer calls from telephone numbers that she doesn't recognize.

4. Did you leave her a voicemail message telling her that you were trying to
locate her?
Needless to say, the patron left the library after speaking with the floor manager. All he told her to do was look in the teen center.

Public Service Announcement

This is my personal opinion. I repeat, this is my own personal opinion.

During Winter Break, Spring Break, Summer Break, or any time that a parent or care giver is unable to watch a child or provide care, PLEASE DON'T THINK THAT IT'S OKAY TO LEAVE THAT CHILD UNATTENDED AT A PUBLIC LIBRARY!!!!!

If you are dropping the child/children off to attend a particular event at the library, please make sure that they are safely inside. Make sure that you are able to pick-up your child/children after the event is over.

I don't reccommend leaving children unattended at any point in the library. The job description for a librarian doesn't require them to watch children (even children's librarians.) We are required to help children search for materials that can be checked out from the library, used as reference, or information that can be found on our databases. We can give you the basics for obtaining information on the internet and we are supposed to explain the risks of using sources from the internet.

Can you tell that Winter Break has begun in my area????

Sundays are so special

Yesterday, I did it to myself.

There is one particular homeless man who likes to frequent our floor. Most times, he disturbes the other patrons and must be escorted out of the library.

Yesterday, he walked onto the floor talking loudly. He was so loud that when he approached a bank of internet computers, all that were using them turned around to stare at him. He noticed them looking at him and got real quiet( I guess he had flashbacks of being asked to leave.)

He found a table and I thought that he would be calm for the rest of the afternoon. No!!!! He approached the desk and began asking the floor manager questions. I was thinking everything would be fine, as long as he left me alone.

About 1/2 hour later, I saw him approaching the desk while I was alone helping a patron. I mumbled, "Aw man!! Here he comes again."

The patron I was helping began laughing as she asked me, "Is he talking to his friends that we can't see?"

I told her that he was. To our surprise, he stopped right beside us and just stared. He then looks me in the face and asks, "AND, how are you doing today?" I answered, and he walked away.

Each time I was on the desk after that, he would stop in front of me and stare for a while. After staring, he would ask, "And, how are you today?"

I guess he wanted me to know that he knew he was irritating me.

Yesterday afternoon........

A woman approached the reference desk. She wanted to know about citing works. She was asking what the different approaches to citation are, what are the most popular methods, and things of that nature.

After showing her quite a few books, she said to me, "You have the greatest job in the world!"

My response, "Some days, it can be."

Patron: "What do you mean? The patrons have to be nice to you because you have so much knowledge about books and where to find information about whatever they are looking for."

My response, " No, not necessarily. They aren't nice most of the time."

Patron, "What do you mean? Why wouldn't they be nice to the librarians?"

In my mind, I was thinking where do I begin? It would take a long time to explain the whys of a patron's behavior.

I said, "There are days when we are cursed, yelled at, argued with, just too many things to name."

I got a propossal yesterday

This guy came to the desk in need of help on the computer. He wanted to know how to print the page that he was viewing. I explained the print process to him and returned to the desk.

Man.......He came to the desk again. This time,.......he wanted to know how to add money to his library card. I explained what he needed to do. He then asked me to walk him through the process. I get up to go show him what he needed to do. He stops me and says, " I left my bag and everything at the computer, I can't leave."

I was tired of the back and forth, so I said, " Come back when your computer time is up and I will tell you what to do so that you can retrieve your print job."

50 minutes passes, and dude returned to the desk. I explained the process once again. He then says, "Can't you just go over there with me and walk me through the process? I'm sure it's probaby easy, but please help a brotha out?"

We get to the copy machine and he says, "You know that I am Special Ed."

He finally has money on his card and is at the print station. He turns to me at the desk, " Can you come over here and tell me what I have to do again?"

So I walked over there with a look that said, "Now What???" He looked at me and said, " So, when do you want to get married because I need someone like you?"

I didn't look at him, nor did I say anything. I guess he took that as encouragement, because he asked me again. I turned around and returned to the desk without acknowledging what he had said.

Heard at the reference desk

Yesterday afternoon, five minutes into my one hour desk duty, one of the custodians stepped to me.

He said, "So, I guess Satin let his people free today!"


ALL I COULD DO WAS LAUGH!!!!!

You never know what the other is thinking

Sunday afternoon, my boss and I are sitting at the reference desk. He closed the window that he had open in frustration.

I asked him what was wrong. He said, "I'm tired of librarians trying to be cool by having blogs!"

*insert weird look*

I then say, "I have a blog."

His response, "Uh oh, it isn't another blog all about us is it?"

Me, "Not really."

Thankfully, a patron approached the desk and deaded that conversation.

My day started out with a bang

My first hour on the reference desk. This man runs over to the desk and yells for me to call security.

A woman had parked herself in front of his computer and proceeded to use. She refused to get up and he wanted her gone immediately(this was on the opposite side of the floor from me.)

When the librarian who was working the desk with me arrived, the same patron yelled that she should call security again because they were taking too long( not two minutes had passed.)

He returned to the desk two more times yelling and screeming that if security didn't hurry up, he was going to remove the woman himself.

In the mean time, the woman was yelling and screeming at him to come over and move her.

2 1/2 minutes and security had arrived three deep. The female patron began talking even more mess, she called them "toy" cops and said they weren't going to do anything to her because they couldn't send her to jail. She taunted them saying,"It's taking three of you to secure one of me."
"Ain't nobody going to do anything to me. All they did the other day was send me to the hospital!"

She called the two female security guards "n's", "black b**ches," and told them not to touch her. In my opinion, that was just the kettle calling the pot black.

By this time, the police sargent had arrived and the patron had quieted. She was still fighting.

There was a group of male and female teenagers from job corps and I heard one of them yell, "MAN, this is better than COPS!"

And I asked the chic, not once but twice

The story goes like this.............This past Wednesday, I asked a co-worker known for calling in sick..........(just because she has accumulated enough sick leave,) if she would be at work today. Sundays are difficult days for reference desk coverage.

So, she called in sick. That wouldn't be bad except, she left work early last Sunday. Then, she called in sick last Monday.

It would have been easier if we had known in advance that she wasn't going to be here. I asked her becuase tomorrow is a holiday for us. It has been my experience that those prone to call in sick almost always do so the work day before a holiday.

I'll just wait and see if they talk to her about this. What she didn't count on was that today is the day that our floor manager was scheduled to work.

Sometimes, I think patrons ask questions for shock value

Patron: Can you direct me to a section?

Me: Hopefully.

Patron: Where are the sex books?

Me: I believe that they are on the next floor up, in the 600's but I will get a title for you.

Patron: I don't mean fiction!

Me: I know, you would like a manual; something like K*rma S*tra

Patron: Yeah. You know I feel like libraries are where knowledge is.

(I continued to search the catalog with the same response that I give everyone)

As I was waiting for the printout, the patron stated,"You know I feel powerful in a green
leather jacket[as he tugged on the lapel of said jacket.]"

Guess what????

One of my coworkers actually had foot surgery while I was on leave. (November 1st was my first day back at work.) She now has a cane and uses a wheelchair at her desk. I guess she showed me!

Blogger problems and new posts

For two weeks straight, each time I tried to log onto blogger so that I could create new posts, I was stuck at the login page. I kept telling myself that I would try from home, but you know how that can go. Since I am at home for a while, I decided to try blogger from home. Well, I can create post, but not much else.

I had no idea that people did this

Last Monday, October 15th, a man and a woman approached the reference desk. They looked to be no more than 19 years of age. They debated who would ask the question. The female finally said, " My job said for me to come to the library and get a book that will tell me how to talk to people, can you help me?" I was shocked, but I proceeded to search the catalog. I am sure that the expression on my face showed what I was thinking because the woman then asked me, "Do you think that you can find something like that in the library?" I told her that I am sure I could find some work etiquette books. I found two books and then the female patron dropped the bomb, "We need two books each." So I returned to the online catalog and continued the search. I finally found something that was about dealing with a$$holes in the workplace. They were so happy, they asked for that call number and they were off in search of the book.

I hate copycats

I am having trouble with blogger today, but at least I am able to post. I'll give you the background first. I had been having problems with my knee, the P.A. gave me a cane because she said I was at risk for a fracture. Now, with that said, on to the incident. I went to work on Tuesday October 9th and everyone one was as normal as they usuallly are. I missed work Wednesday October 10th because of a medical appointment. When I returned to work on Thursday October 11th, the woman who had been making snide remarks regarding my use of a cane, arrived at work with what? A cane. The other hypochondriac on our floor also had a cane. The first thing that I asked my boss is, "Can't I have anything by myself?" His response, "NO."

Security in the building

My first hour on the reference desk this morning; the head of security was making the rounds, introducing the new hire. Only, he's not so new to working for this City & County. His prior post from which I recognized him, was working the door at the downtown police precinct.

Why did dude circle back without his boss and ask me the same tired line that he would ask each and everytime that I saw him when I went to jury duty, get my car out of impound, file a hit & run report, you name it. "Did you go to high school in the city?" I had to stop the madness!!!

My response, " You ask me that each and every time that you see me! YES, I did, I.C.A."

That usually shuts him down because it is an all girls catholic high school. And no, I didn't go to school with him, nor did he do security at my high school.

This fool had the nerve to say, "Well, if you already knew me, why didn't you ask how I have been when my boss introduced us?"

He kept talking, but I said, " Nope, Umph, Umph, not." [ala NewNew] I didn't even hear the rest of whatever he was saying because I had tuned him out.

Today's adventures

I had the luxury of a four day weekend. Well, we all know that you find little surprises after being gone for a while.

We have e-mail suggestions and e-mail reference questions. Lucky for me, the floor manager is the person who assigns the items.

The first question I received, the guy asks if he can get a list of all of the poetry books purchased by the library this year. Our fiscal year is from July 1st until June 30th of the following year. We purchase books every month. For me to answer this question, I had to review all books purchased for the last fiscal year and the first three months of this one. Each month, we make two list, one of new books and one of replacement books. I spent two hours cutting and pasting the poetry titles from all list.

That was a behind the scenes question.

The desk question:

Caller: I am trying to locate information for an actor.

Me: Did you try searching the IMBD website?

Caller: That really doesn't give any information.

Me: What's the actor's name?

Caller: Well, it's a relative of mine and I'm nosey, so I just want to know what is available.

Me: What's the actor's name?

Caller: I called your library because I figured you are located in a liberal city and the librarians
wouldn't judge.
Me: What's the actor's name? I am only asking so that I can conduct a search to see what I can
find.
Caller: Well, its an um, um, an adult film star. I actually live in the midwest and I use my local
library all of the time, but they wouldn't search anything like this.

Me: OOOkay, so what's the name? [He was still trying to tell me how much they judge people
at his local library] I was thinking that they probably just look at him sideways.

Caller: Donita Dunes. She's a distant cousin and my sister calls me to tell me the family gossip.
I just want to know what is out there about her.
Well, I did a g***le search and found her website. I closed the website before it finished loading because of the racy pictures. I told the caller this.

Caller: I just want her contact information. You know, her agent, or her publist.

I tried a specific search for the contact information and was able to get the website address for the booking agency. I told the caller and he hung up the telephone so fast.

He lost me for a minute

Last Monday, September 17th, I was helping a patron who seemed to have suffered a stroke. He seemed to be paralyzed on one side of his body and had difficulty speaking. He also used a walker.
I was finally able to piece together that he wanted to use one of the internet computers. I found a vacant one in the back. I chose one near the exit aisles because I thought that would be easier for him.

About 12 minutes later, he approached the desk again. This time, he was complaining that he wasn't able to log onto the computer and for me to,"Juuus commme!" I went back there and he was trying to log onto a different computer, and he was still logged onto the first computer. I tried to explain this to him a few times. Well, he kept telling me,"NO." Finally, I simply logged him off myself and told him that after a few seconds, he should be able to log onto whichever terminal he wanted.

Ten more minutes passed and he was back at the reference desk again. He said, "Man wwwith bbbaaaagg STINKS, IIIII mmmmovvveee." I simply said okay. I finally ended up booking him a computer for the next hour on a different floor. This was after thirty minutes of back and forth.

Same stuff every single day

We've been experiencing the same complaints on a daily basis for the past three weeks. You see, the library is still in the process of renovation on the first floor.

The renovation process has moved into the second phase. This means that the new fiction stacks are gone. The new DVD stacks are gone. The express internet computers are gone.

Now, the new books are mixed in with the older works of fiction. The problems occur when we (the staff) are trying to explain the changes to the patrons. Because the bank of express computers had to be removed, there are now more express computers on the 3rd, 4th, and 5th floors.

Often, patrons walk away while I am in the middle of explaining the new changes. Others yell, " NOW, Whose BRIGHT IDEA was this, because it surely isn't working."

Out of the mouths of librarians

Staff meeting: While waiting for the meeting to begin, somehow the conversation turned to how
expensive hair cuts are.

Pt. Librarian, "Well, I cut my own hair and I guess that I've saved hundreds of
dollars over time." [we now know why she rocks a bad high top
fade with a duck tail]

Monthly services meeting: I was showing a fellow librarian a delightful find, Band Aid's Blister
Block. She commented that she has a hard time finding wide shoes.

Another librarian blurted, "That's why I shop at Pay*ess, they have
wide shoes in all kinds of styles."

The conversation paused......then we changed the subject.

This morning, my first hour on the reference desk. My co-worker annouces as she approached the desk, "I'm still HIGH from yesterday!" [She called in sick yesterday, saying that she was going to the emergency room to receive a morphine shot for her migraine.]

So this is how it ends today

It is my last hour on the reference desk and I have spent it listening to a patron read the World Atlas out loud. I have wanted to say something, but I realize that may be the only way that he is able to read.

Man..............these people

So, I am sitting at the reference desk minding my own business, reading somebody's blog.

A patron marched up to the desk, threw a book at me and said,"I HOPE THIS LIBRARY HAS A CHRISTIANS FOR DUMMIES book, or a PROTESTANT FOR DUMMIES book, because just having an ISLAM FOR DUMMIES book isn't right.

I respond,"I'm sure we do sir, would you like for me to check?"

Patron: "YEAH, YOU MAKE SURE THAT YOU CHECK THAT OUT!!!! IT WOULD NOT BE RIGHT IF THERE IS ONLY A 'ISLAM FOR DUMMIES' BOOK"

So as I began to search the online catalog, the fool stormed off.

Yesterday afternoon, this woman yelled at me because HER book wasn't on the shelf. As if I personally walked over and removed her book form the shelf, just so she wouldn't have the pleasure of walking in here and seeing her work on the shelf.

I went through the trouble of searching high and low for that book. I finally found in on a book truck in the back, waiting to be reshelved. I took the book to her and handed it to her. The witch had the nerve to tell me, " I didn't want the book, I just wanted to make sure that it was here! Why are you giving it to me, do you want me to reshelve it?"

She went on to say that when she came in the day before, they told her it was missing. She said that she located the book on the shelf and removed it, so that she could show them( the page desk staff) that it was still in the library. Hence the reason why the book was sitting on a book truck in the back waiting to be reshelved.

That is the point where my supervisor took over. He told the patron that she was wrong for yelling at me and it would not be tolerated.

Random stories for today

This morning, in the span of 10 minutes I was told this by two different patrons.

1. African American female in her late forties: " Sharon and Bob stole my credit card information from one of the branch libraries and were buying sex with it. You know you can't buy sex in Antioch"

I couldn't respond, I was laughing so hard.

2. Anglo male was having trouble booking a computer at one of the branch libraries. I told him
log out of his record and I would help him book a computer at the reference desk. As I am
helping him, he said, " All of the staff at the branch library are CRAZY!" This was right after
he told me that while he was speaking to some police officers, they told him he was crazy
because his face was swollen.

I turned to my co-worker and asked him, "What is it that I am doing because they just keep
approaching me?"